Choose To Make More Beauty

Being on modified bed rest has been a great opportunity (looking for the good) to go through old yoga notes. Yesterday I was reading my notes from the Anusara-Inspired teachers gathering in Tahoe during Wanderlust, during it John Friend said, “Every day we get to choose to make more beauty, to make more light, to bring more love into the world, or not”. This really stood out to me. We have a choice! Meaning we can choose to bring more beauty + light + love into the world or we can choose to bring more ugliness + darkness + hate into the world. I hadn't thought about the flip slide of this before. I just thought laa dee daa I am bringing more beauty into the world. I didn't think that all those times I don't feel good, don't hold the door open for someone, flip someone off driving, make rude judgemental mental comments in my head at the market, gossip with friends about someone, be in self pity, or just leave the house in a bad mood. In all those examples I am choosing to negatively impact the world we live in and share.

This made me think about emissions. We are all emitting energy all the time, it is often called our aura or the energy field that surrounds our body. Think about what it feels like to be physically close to someone who is happy and how it makes you feel to just being near them. Now imagine what it would feel like if that person was sad, or angry. The energy they are emitting and you are experiencing just from being in their field is drastically different. In this way just by choosing our attitude we are choosing to either add more love + joy + enthusiasm to the world or we are choosing to add more  hate + sadness + angry to the world. (Not to say we should never experience these feelings it is healthy to experience the full spectrum of emotions but not healthy to stew in it... another topic for another post.)

When I think of things that emit in a way that brings more beauty and love into the world I think of the sun, artists, flowers, happy dogs, color full leaves, rainbows... when I think of things that pollute the world I think of smoke stacks, cars, oil spills, garbage, cigarette smoke.... Which do you want to be? I want to be a bright flower that makes people smile + feel better.

WHAT ARE YOU EMITTING?

 OR...

This simple yet profound teaching has struck a chord in my heart and now I am so much more aware every time I open my mouth to speak (or sometimes too late, and I notice it after I have already spoken...change comes at first with awareness).  I am a big fan of the gratitude practices, of writing in my journal, often at night, a list of things I am grateful for. I do this especially when I am feeling sorry for myself. Well I am starting a new practice! A Shri (beauty) practice! I write down how I added beauty + light + love to the word for the day. It has been making me feel really good to look at the list and brings happiness to my heart as participate in creating a happy earth for all. I invite each of you to become more conscious of the ways that you contribute more beauty to the world each day.

Look, touch, speak, and breathe beauty!

Definitions:
E·mits: To give or send out (matter or energy).
pol·lu·tion: The presence in or introduction into the environment of a substance or thing that has harmful or poisonous effects.

Awareness

Fall is a time of change and offers a great opportunity to be more aware. Be aware of the changing colors of the leaves and sounds. Be aware of the air, the way it feels, smells, and even tastes. This awareness and wonder of nature helps me be present. It encourages me to feel my breath, my body, and notice what going on in my mind.  Today I walked my dog taking everything in, the beauty of nature, the honking horns of cars, the man racking up leaves... We walked to the park and toward the tree under which I often practice yoga and I saw two bums sleeping. I left the park and found a grassy patch down an alley. There  I practiced.

Did an hour and a half practice. My intention: Awareness. As I went through my surya namaskar A and B's I noticed my breath, the grass under my fingers, the feeling of my body... often thoughts would cross my mind, "That man racking leaves is staring at me". As I returned to stand at the top of my mat with my hands in front of my heart, I paused with my eyes closed. I noticed how I felt standing, I reflected on how my last sequence went, was I aware the whole time or were there some distractions. I noticed the answer trying to be as compassionate to my self as possible. In other words not criticizing myself for being a failure for having thoughts! Then I reflected on my intention of being aware and continued into the next pose and continuing to reflect.

Being aware made this somewhat intense practice feel sweet and calm. I even ended up doing sirsasana (headstand) drop backs, and a few rounds of Mandalasana. This is one of the first times of me really doing mandalasana multiple times  back and fourth. I had no clue I was going to be performing that today but I felt this inner pull because I was so present with my self and with my surrounding. It was really great experience.

Here is a link of Noah Maze freaking rocking Mandalasana and includes tic- toc from Sirsasana (I did not do the tic toc jumping back and forth)

in the flow of Shakti

I am so grateful for my continued ability to follow my passion, my interest in yoga and my spiritual union with god. Since I began my love affair with yoga six years ago I have faced personal, internal, external, and spiritual challenges as well as put a lot of time, money and dedication into this ancient practice. Standing where I am today, I think back to the person I was when I did my first downward facing dog pose I am shocked at how different my life is on so many aspects Now the relationship I have with myself is of compassion, acceptance and understanding. The relationships I have with others are more meaningful and genuine. The relationship I have with the world around me and the way I step into the current of life/grace is one hundred percent different. Because of my yoga and studentship I am continuing learn how to align and flow with the sweet flow of Shakti through life’s ups and downs.

Approaching Acceptance

I am doing Elena Brower’s five day Yoga a Course in living “Approaching Acceptance”. This is the second time that I am doing this course and I am very thrilled because I have made tremendous shifts in my life regarding acceptance. Before acceptance was a topic that I could only understand with my mind. Before when I went through this course I was very open to the idea of acceptance however I was also very much in my eating disorder. I thought if I could control my body and get it to a place I liked then I could accept myself, but until then I can still accept others.

Through my experience I now know that I have to be proactively nourishing myself and choosing more appropriate coping mechanisms and in this process I have to remain soft with acceptance and compassion for myself. But acceptance, for me, is not like flipping a switch it took and continues to take lots of work to stay soft, patient, compassionate, and optimistic. I know see how huge a barrier the eating disorder was for my ability to accept anything. I have heard the saying before “if you can not show compassion to yourself you can not show compassion to anyone else.” Before I tried to accept all the things around me but I continued to feel shame and guilt about the person I was.

Through hard work and support from others I am starting to understand acceptance and softness in a new way, I no longer understand it mentally but I can feel it with my whole being. I am learning to accept who I am. This means embracing my whole self including my past struggles and my shame and my guilt. When I fully accept myself in this way I feel a softness inside along with peace, joy and love.

I used to love the way I felt during and after in Elena Brower’s yoga classes (thank you yogaglo) yet she talks about softening a lot and softening was something I could just grasp mentally. Now through this opportunity that the eating disorder has provided for me I now see that softness is acceptance and acceptance is an approach of softness. Now as I take her class I love them to such a deeper level because every down dog and pose I do is an opportunity to soften and learn to accept myself. I can tell you the old saying is right now that I have acceptance for myself I am actually able to accept others too.

http://www.artofattention.com/yoga-of-living-course/

why practice yoga? a section I love from Anusara Teacher Training Manual

I am teaching a class at Avenues Yoga tomorrow! 8:30-10:00am I am very excited I have been wanting to teach at this beautiful studio for so long but told myself when the time is right it will happen. And it did my good friend and teacher Jen Hech suggested me to take over her class and I am so grateful for this :). I was looking through the Anusara manual as I gather my ideas for the class and I was reading this and it made me smile so I thought I would share it.

"there are two central spiritual purposes of hatha yoga:

1. Co-participating with God in making a spiritual art with the body.
2. Realizing our divine nature through the temple of the body.

The main intention of class is derived from these purposes. For example:

• Experiencing our innate goodness, joy, love, worthiness, or divine power through the poses.
• Doing the poses as artistic expressions or celebrations of one's spirit.
• Purifying the body/mind through hatha yoga in order to create a better vessel for god's love and grace.
• Preparing the body to sit more easily for meditation.
• Practicing hatha yoga just for the fun and enjoyment of it"

(Anusara Yoga Teacher Training Manual By John Friend pg60)

roses!!! self love!!! shoulder loop and kidney loop

February is the month of love and I think with valentines and the hallmark industry a lot of the emphasis of love gets put on someone else. Like the love you have for your family or your significant other, which is an important relationship to celebrate! But I think it is important to also celebrate the love you have for yourself and the relationship you have with yourself. Today in class we focus on shoulder loop, kidney loop and lip loop (smile). We cultivated physical strength to hold are arm bones, collar bones and shoulders back (shoulder loop) as well as physical strength in the core as we expanded into the kidneys (kidney loop). As we worked these refinements of alignment we deepen our relationship and our understanding of our self as we shine more brightly, celebrating the love we have for our self. (This alignment also physically create less stress, tension and headaches, how awesome is that?!)

Shoulder loop. One of the seven loops (or eight if you count lip loop) in Anusara yoga where we energetically and physically draw the arm bones, collar bones and scapulas back and into the back of the heart. When I was learning shoulder loop I was so excited. I tend to be a very enthusiastic yogi. With this enthusiasm for shoulder loop I didn’t realize that I was also sticking my floating ribs out tremendously. This not only allowed my core to miss out in the heart opening experience but it also compressed my kidneys. Now as I practice opening my heart with confidence and strength I also make sure to practice another loop, kidney loop, where I pull the floating ribs in and expand into my kidneys. This action invites my core to join into this celebration of opening the heart while providing a more stable base.

As I was thinking about teaching a class where I wanted to do back bend asanas, I wanted to work on shoulder loop and kidney loop I was trying to think of some good metaphors. Since it is Valentine’s Day I have been inspired by the beautiful roses I have been seeing I wanted to talk about opening up like a rose, the uncurling of the peddles. Going from a place of contraction like the bud of the rose, or the shoulders rounded forward, to a place of expansion and an opening of genuine beauty. I love how when a rose or any flower is open I don’t think “that flower would be more beautiful if that pedal was a different color…” I just think “wow pure beauty!” I wish I could look at myself and not pick at things I wish were different and instead just see the pure natural beauty. So this opening is how I am going to link shoulder loop. But how will I get this metaphor to work for kidney loop?…..I thought when a flower is in a bud the stem is straight and when the flower opens it does NOT all of a sudden put a kink in the middle of the stem. If it did that it would snap the stem in half which would cause the flower to die. No the stem stays strong which supports the opening of the bud. SO as we work shoulder loop we to need to maintain the integrity of our core by practicing kidney loop.

Ta Da!! That is how I am linking shoulder loop and kidney loop into the theme of self love celebration + our relationship with our self + roses...

The class went great. I wrote this blog before and fine tuned it after. But one thing I realized while teaching the class that was wonderful and not fully planned. Was that the loops are really a refinement of the practice. Asking the students to really observe where they are in the pose and what their shoulders and ribs are doing and based off that non judgmental observation make these refinements to experience more of an opening… that focus, patience and awareness really helped deepen the relationship each student had with themselves. (it was wonderful to be a part of that)

Wednesday = fun day

Wednesday was a crazy day! I got a call from Matt Newman and was invited to a yoga class at his house. I was so excited. The problem was that I was to teach a class at the same time at The Yoga Center. I tried very hard to find a sub but I could not. I contacted the studio owner and I thought I would cancel my class so I could expand as a student and a teacher by attending Matts private yoga class.

After school I went and taught a class at Waterford. I teach weekly classes at Waterford for their faculty 345-445. This is one of my favorite classes. Such wonderful people and so open to whatever I offer. I have been working with this group for over a year and I truly feel that they have helped me grow into the teacher I am now. When I arrived I was a little late so I ran into the building leaving my notebook behind. I have a notebook where I outline the idea of the class along with the theme. I normally improvise off of the outline but I always, always bring it with me. It is like my saftey blanket as a yoga teacher. However today I ran into class without it. As I was running and realized I forgot my book I thought about recently certified Anusara teacher Maria Christina. She has been blogging about how she has stopped overly planning her class and instead is being present and is offering what is wanted. I thought I should do that today. When I entered the class I asked how people were doing. A few people said they had “homework neck” i.e. their neck hurt because they have been looking down to grade papers. One student came up to me and asked me to look at her chaturanga because her shoulders where hurting after a class she took previously that week. And another student asked me to go over keeping the shoulders integrated when reaching up. She said “there must be something wrong with me”. After receiving this information I thought shoulder loop, we will work on shoulder loop. This was totaly different then I planned. I don’t even know how I thought up the poses and the order but they all worked so well. We did partner work. It was so great. There were many ah ha moments for many of the students. Each student talked to me after class and expressed how much they enjoyed the class. One woman said I need this every class. It was really moving and helped me realize that I don’t need to overly plan and memorize the class I want to teach. That I have the knowledge and wisdom in me. I have practiced and studied a lot and that I can spontaneously teach what is needed in that moment.

After the class I also decided (I actually decided as I was running to Waterford) that I was going to teach my class at the yoga center. I knew Leslie (the studio owner) would be fine if I canceled. She is a wonderful woman and really wants everyone, her teachers included, to grow as yoga students. However I wanted to be responsible and dependable although I did have a feeling like no one would show up because my two regular students both told me they would be missing today. However I had four students show up. Three of which were new to me. Everyone loved the class, I think. Two of the new students where a couple, they had come to two other classes at the yoga center that week. The women had a hurt back and read my bio and thought I would be perfect. Though out class we had lots of fun, lots of laughs, after class the women pulled me aside and said this is what she had been looking for. That she REALLY APPRIACETED my personality. What a tremendous compliment. My heart melted.

GREAT DAY. TEACHING AND LIVING.

I also got a new hula hoop from my new friend Sara Bear Hogan! She is so wonderful. I love my new hoop. The colors are magnificent! It is light I can do many tricks I couldn’t do before. And it is collapsible. Please check her out. http://hoopology.weebly.com/

about the two classes I taught today, and the bilboard add I saw on the way home

I taught two classes today:
My first class at flow EMC 9:15-10:30 we worked on cultivating qualities of perseverance, acceptance, and patience. We did lots of forward folds (remember forward folds are any pose in which the hip is flexed forward, so we did lots of deep standing poses), and some fun arm balances including playing with linking different bakasana poses.

My afternoon class at Kula 12-1 we talked about how the studio is going through some shifts, and how this shift provides an opportunity for us to look for the good. I used a pretty funny metaphor about a TV antenna and how we can use our asana practice as a way to adjust our antenna so the goodness/bliss “channel” comes in really clear. Haha we did some hip opening and back bends. I kept encouraging the students to soften their eyes and become sensitive to the way they feel inside. Becoming so sensitive that they can be aware of the inner goodness that is within them.

As I was driving home I saw a billboard Coke add, that read “open happiness” (I couldnt find the same billboard add I saw but here are two that provide the same message):


The society we live in which is based off of corporations and consumerism tells us over and over, that we are missing something. We are lacking something (their product)., and until we get it (their product) we cant be happy. This leaves us to think that we always need to be seeking something external from our self in order to feel full, and feel happy.

Here are just some of the things society is trying to sell us with the promise that it will make us happy:
•Beer
•Weigh loss
•Make up
•Cigarettes
•Soda
•Candy
•Plastic surgery
•Tampons
•clothes
•…….
Those anti-smoking commercials are correct when they say “You are a target for Big Tobacco”. But it isn’t just big tobacco, we are a target everywhere because we are surrounded by signs, commercials, magazines….that are telling us that we are not ENOUGH.
This is one thing I love about yoga. When we practice yoga asana, when we step onto our mat it is us saying that instead of seeking happiness from outside, I am going to go within and REMEMBER that inside of me is all the happiness, bliss, and peace I could ever want. Our society and the way many people live their lives has caused us to forget. And yoga is a process of remembering our goodness, and our worth.
So the next time you see an add, that is in some way saying buy my product and you will be happy, laugh and know that you already have everything you need to make you happy inside your own heart.

Making beauty through asana…SHRI

I was watching one of John Friend’s Yoga Teacher Training DVD’s today and he was talking about reasons we practice yoga. He said one reason to practice yoga is to co-create with the divine, so we may bring more beauty into the world through our artistic expression. I love this! We all have the power to create beauty though our own freedom! We can choose to co-create with the Universal! Through the practice of Anusara yoga, by aligning with the divine and remembering the Universal, we experience delight.

Through the practice of asana, pranayama and remembering the heart we draw into ourselves (muscular energy). Through this drawing in we find our inner luster, we remember our divine nature, and we remember our beauty. In drawing in we see and experience our intrinsic goodness. We have this moment of AHHA, like an inner sigh, as we recognize that we are an expression of this one divine essence! Through this recognition we can shine out (organic energy). We shine out our glorification of this inner recognition. When we come to this place of inner connection and recognition and shine out from this divine space, we add the most beauty possible to the world.

In this DVD, John used a metaphor that I really liked and used in my classes today (at Flow and Kula). John said it is like we are all an instrument and our instrument is unique to each one of us. No one in the world has the same instrument as us. With our own instrument through alignment, breath, and our heart connection we can play the instrument and make the most beautiful noise. A noise that no one else can make, a noise that is truly ours to contribute to the whole. When we practice with heart and alignment we play our instrument as best we can. We contribute this sound to the whole in our asana class making a beautiful orchestra! Not only do we contribute our unique instrument sound to our asana class, but we contribute our beauty to all the yogis worldwide, contributing to the global orchestra. John said that we can also think of ourselves as a whole orchestra and that each part of our body is its own instrument. Through aligning each part of our body correctly and being very aware of all the different body parts/ musical instruments, we contribute to one orchestra. (What a lovely metaphor)

I have been practicing mainly Vinyasa, and Prana Vinyasa Yoga for many years and have recently found Anusara yoga. When I think about this metaphor, especially the one where I am the whole orchestra and each part of my body is its own instrument that contributes to the beautiful sounds of the whole orchestra (my whole self), gets me thinking about how I used to perform asanas. I thought I was getting pretty good. I looked good in the pose, I could hold it for a long time, but now I realize that not every part of my body was involved in the pose. I had trained myself to come into a pose and collapse and just allow my bone structure to hold me up. I wasn’t playing all my instruments in the most beneficial way. Yes, it was easy because I wasn’t engaged. Now when I do yoga, even if I am in a basic class, every pose I come into, and every part of my body, every instrument is contributing someway to the whole.

This is Shri. Shri means “radiance” in Sanskrit, it can also be translated as beauty or that which is inspiring. Shri is essential beauty, something that lifts and opens your heart. Shri is the recognition of our intrinsic goodness. The effervescent light that shines from within when we align with the divine and we experience a AHHH...sensation in our mind body and spirit.

May we align with the divine in our asana poses and in our life so we may choose to contribute more beauty to the world, and with this wonderful life we have been blessed with.

Happy day to you, may we all reflect and connect to our heart on and off the matt.